Chander is a very sincere boy in 1st standard, somehow on one day he could not complete his homework as his mother was ill and his father could not help him to complete it on time due to his busy office schedule. Next day in the school, teacher scolded very hard to Chander without understanding the fact. Chander had never experience such rude scolding in past. He felt bad. On that day he could not focus on the studies and instructions of teacher; result of which, he could not write anything in his daily calendar. He had less homework. Next day same incidence was repeated. Chander understood that if he didn’t tell his mother about the homework, he would relieve from compulsory homework. Teacher would scold him, but it didn’t matter much. He would get more time to play, watch TV. Chander had made his mind and decided that he would not share anything to anybody in future. He also started to lie to his parents and teacher by giving certain excuses. So his winning formula evaluated was “to lie, not to share.” By doing this he thought that he would be successful in his certain goals.
I developed an employment blank form where candidate has to mention his strengths and weaknesses. 99.99% candidates mentioned that they are emotional. Tough and assertive people also think that they are enough emotional. Why this is so? The main reason is our childhood and our upbringing. Parents and adults around us nourish the emotional dimension of the human being. Positive and negative emotions are main components of our life. Being emotional, either passive or positive is the wining formula for most of the people.
Sumeet was denied to play by his mates. The reason could be anything. But Sumeet decided that if others are not allowing him to play, he would make his own team. He did that by using different tactics, like attracting other children by offering them to play his toys, sometimes by requesting them and sometimes just by being more aggressive. Sumeet decided to be team former and leader and this was his winning formula.
Survival of the fittest means to find out some ways for surviving in different events of life. Human find out these means based on his experiences. We develop/create the winning formula based on our past experiences, mostly during childhood. Every human being has his winning formula. This is not necessary that the winning formula is logical or right. It is the mere experience where results are perceived. It can be illusioned satisfaction where person thinks that by using the tactic he would be successful in something.
Does it really important to find out the wining formula? In my opinion, yes. Winning formula is just the perceived dimension of personality. If your winning formula is negative, then there are lots of chances to be more passive or aggressive in life. If you understand the derivation of your winning formula, then at least you can redevelop of amend the formula with new context. Roots of your personality are in past. Your parents, teacher and surrounding have major influence on your personality. Hence it is necessary to understand these roots.
Just seat back, relax and go in your past. Experience, why you are “you” today. It will help you to identify the derivation of your personality. You will understand why this is important to your kids if you are parents and to your students, if you are a teacher.